My sad life: A wonky tamale and a stalker cat.

I started the month with the idea that I would make international holiday foods. I made alfajores, which were a tasty disaster. After those, I made German Stollen and Mexican tamales. What do all these dishes have in common besides being Christmas foods? At some point, a few hours in to preparing them, you will think, “What have I gotten myself into?”

General tips for making food that other cultures deem “once-a-year” foods:

1. Find an aunt, mom or grandma from that country who makes the dish. They could probably give you some pointers, or maybe they will feel sorry for you and just give you some food.

2. If all else fails, look it up on YouTube.

3. Give yourself twice as much time as the recipe calls for.

4. Don’t put all your eggs in one basket. Both literally, because baskets are no good for egg travel, and figuratively because if you base your whole meal off a new dish you’ve never made before, you might go hungry.

I’m sure that if I decided to make them again, I would be more prepared, but I’ve put off writing the recipe posts because I’ve been afraid they would be overly technical. Rather than wait until after Christmas to share these recipes, I’m going to give you the abridged version.

Delicious Almond Stollen (or Köstlicher Mandel-Stollen)

Stollen is a traditional German sweet bread made with nuts and candied fruit. Don’t be alarmed, this is not the kind of fruitcake you use for doorstops, although I found the candied fruit in the fruitcake baking area of the grocery. Apparently, stollen are normally made weeks in advance and kept in cold rooms or basements. I didn’t have that kind of time, so I wrapped mine up and kept it in the freezer for a few days, and that worked fine to get the right texture and flavor. It is sweet and festive, and kind of addictive.

I used a recipe from a German magazine which gave all the measurements in weight rather than cups, which triggered my math phobia. My roommate translated the recipe as I went along and helped me figure out the weights using her scale.

Making Stollen. Weighing fruit, reading German and covering the kitchen in powdered sugar.

This recipe looks similar to the one I used, except I didn’t soak my fruit in rum and I used candied lemon and orange instead of fresh grated. After you bake your loaves, add a coat of melted butter followed by a coat of powdered sugar. Repeat about 2 or 3 times and let the dough cool.

Tip #1: Adding a coat of melted butter + powdered sugar (repeat x3) to any dessert will make it a winner.

Tip #2: Don’t be alarmed if your fruit starts falling out of your dough. There is only so much fruit the dough can handle.

Bean and cheese tamales. Don't judge a dish by its poor presentation - these were good!

Vegetarian Bean and Cheese Tamales

My final holiday cooking adventure came in the form of five hour tamales. I decided to make bean tamales using this recipe, and I made a vegan masa using vegetable shortening rather than lard.  I had no problem finding the masa harina (the corn meal stuff), but had to go to a Latin grocer to find the corn husks.

Soaking husks and making masa

I’m not sure if my dough was too dry. When I made it according to the recipe, it seemed gooey, so I added more flour. When I started looking at videos about tamales, their masa was more of a paste. The final taste was the same, but the dough might be thicker than normal if you make it like mine.

I used a can of pinto beans + a can of black beans + some spicy cheese + peppers + onions + garlic for the filling.

Folding the tamales weren't super hard, but I think they would have stayed together better if i would have tied them with some string.

The only equipment I used that I don’t normally have in my kitchen was the steam basket thing that sits in the bottom of a pot. I checked the water level in my pot during the cooking and had to add more only once. After all that mixing and cooking and rolling… you have to wait 1.5 hours for them to cook. So, don’t start tamales hungry! I had to make Carlton a snack while they were cooking, since he came over assuming that it wouldn’t take five hours to make dinner.

Tip #1: You need lots of time to make these. Soak your husks at least 2 hours before you start cooking, and give yourself at least an hour to refrigerate your masa once it is formed into a dough.